Every Successful Person Has This One Thing
Have you ever met someone really sharp and wondered why they weren’t more successful? They’re intelligent, articulate, organized, maybe even attractive, but for some reason they can’t seem to get ahead. I’ve discovered that most of the time it comes down to something very simple, personality.
I’ve spent the better part of my adult life studying and appreciating the art of human dynamics. I’m fascinated by human interaction and why people do what they do. I discern why people make decisions that defy logic and why some are wildly successful, why others fail.
I’ve interacted with dozens of failures that had everything going for them and I’ve met dozens of highly successful people that faced a litany of obstacles they had to overcome in order to achieve success. The common factor that separated all of them was undoubtedly their personality.
Have you ever heard the phrase, “It’s not a personality contest”? I’m here to tell you that life is one big personality contest. I’ve discovered that people gravitate to personality more than anything else. We might be attracted by beauty, for a short time, but it never lasts. Personality will win the day. Money may buy friends, but will be short lived and the friends disappear when the money runs out. Fame will attract people, but as soon as the fame wanes, people will not stick around if the person holding the fame doesn’t have the personality to keep them around after the fame dissipates.
Personality can be called many things. Likability, attitude, charm, or charisma. It comes in many forms, and all of them lead to one principle that is as real and as powerful as gravity and that is attraction. People are attracted to people they like and people like folks with personality. So how do you define personality and how do you achieve a personality that breeds success?
Defining personality is painfully simple. Personality is anyone who makes those around them feel better about themselves. When you walk away after interacting with someone with an attractive personality, you feel better about life. You feel invigorated, excited, and can’t wait to interact with that person again soon! You know people like this and you find yourself gravitating to them. People like President John F. Kennedy, Pope Francis, Johnny Carson, or Tony Robbins. What did they do to achieve such attractive personalities? They made us feel better and gave us hope. They made us feel important and gave us vision for something greater than ourselves.
President Kennedy challenged us to travel to the moon, Pope Francis humbles himself and interacts regularly with those that are less fortunate. Johnny Carson was self-deprecating and made us laugh at his own inequities, and Tony Robbins believes in us and motivates us to believe in ourselves. By the way, an attractive personality doesn’t mean you have to be an extrovert or the life of the party. Johnny Carson was an extreme introvert. He made America feel great during his nightly show, but off camera, he was a very private person. Personality is not about how many friends you have, it’s how you make others feel when you’re around them, whether it’s one person or a thousand people. Do you have a positive, lasting impact on others?
A person with personality is not self-absorbed. A person with personality is curious and asks questions, this person is always learning and genuinely interested in others. This person never takes herself seriously and has a healthy perspective in life. This person is generally positive and sees the best in others while thinking less of himself. If you truly want to develop a successful personality then stop looking inward and begin looking outward. Every person you encounter has something of value to offer the world. Make it your mission to mine value out of every relationship and you will be surprised at how many people will come your way and the opportunities that follow.
People with the right personality are never without opportunity because their paths are always paved with genuine acts of empowering others. What is your personality and will it breed success?