Time Is Irrelevant, Embrace Your Moments
It’s surreal to greet family, colleagues and friends as they line up to pay their respects to my family. I peer over my shoulder and stare at my sister’s lifeless body and try to imagine a life without her in it. I shrug off the emotions welling up in my gut and turn to face the long line of people waiting to speak to my family and console us over my sister’s death.
It didn’t take long for my eyes to find her. She stands out like an angelic figure and even seems to glow as I allow my eyes to soak in her image. It’s a moment that I can vividly conjure up even today, seventeen years later. Her platinum blond hair playfully touch her shoulders and her trendy grey pant suit clings to her petite frame. Her smile reveals a mouth full of braces, but it’s her eyes that capture my heart. The sparkle in her eyes lights up the room and demand my attention. Once her eyes meet mine, it’s over, I fall in love immediately with the woman that I would ask to marry me six months later.
Time slowed down in that moment and my entire world collapsed and surrendered to the space between me and my future wife, Alia. In that moment, time became irrelevant. My entire being, down to the core of my soul, wanted to interact with the gift God presented me that night. That moment, when my eyes first met Alia’s, remains my single greatest moment of my life.
That evening, when I first met Alia, I cannot tell you how long I stood there and greeted every person that walked into the funeral home. If you ask Alia, she cannot remember how long she had to wait in line, before she met me. We both can only recall the moment we met and how we felt about the experience. In fact, as I reflect on my life, I can rarely recount the time I spent experiencing things, I only remember the moments. I remember how I felt and how my life changed as a result. The time spent during those moments are of no consequence.
Time is a tangible terrorist that haunts every one of us. When were younger it seems that it doesn’t pass fast enough. Christmas day could never come quick enough during those long, sleepless Christmas Eve nights. Long days at school seemed to drag on forever until the final bell of the day released us into a world of possibilities. As we get older, time becomes a formidable foe that teases us and never fully embraces us. It slips away and won’t allow us to settle and ultimately leaves us with nothing left. In the end, time always wins and eventually turns it back on us.
Time is overrated. Why do we give it so much authority over our lives? I believe we have it wrong when it comes to time. Time is a fickle friend that cares nothing of our plans and dreams. It’s a cold-hearted partner and enjoys bullying us. We empower time with our frantic worship of it, and it needs to stop. My message to time is, “you suck.”
Instead, we should give our love and affection to our shy, but most loyal partner, moments. Yes, if you pause and allow yourself to reflect on your life, you realize that the moments you experience are what you value most. You don’t remember the time, you remember the moments of your life. Those moments flash like beautiful snap shots in your mind. Your moments make you smile, laugh, and even cry as you recount your most cherished experiences.
Stop thinking about time, it’s selfish and will only steal your joy. Instead focus on your moments. It will never disappoint you and will quietly comfort you when you need it the most. Instead of spending time with someone you love, why not create moments with them instead? Do you see the difference? Time passes whether you want it to or not. You cannot control time, so stop trying to manage it. There’s no such thing as “time management”, it’s a lie. You can only manipulate your moments, for only you can choose to appreciate them.
Your moments are often simple, and quietly pass you by if you fail to notice. It’s that moment that your daughter sits next to you on the couch and wants to talk about a situation at school and seeks your advice. It’s that moment you wake up before the world and enjoy some quiet time to yourself and with God. It’s that moment your entire family gathers at the dinner table. It’s up to you to appreciate them and capture them.
Time will always be with you and is a partner that you must tolerate, just stop giving it so much power. When you discover yourself stressing over time, then I encourage you to break the cycle and instead take a deep breath and look for an opportunity to capture a moment. What moments will you create and appreciate today?